Hard Thing of the Day

I had to do a very hard for me thing today.

No it wasn't dealing with a screaming teething baby.

It wasn't potty training my 3 year old.

It wasn't being at home all day long by myself while my hubby was working extra temporarily.

It wasn't finding the motivation to do my housework.

It wasn't going in to pay rent not knowing whether or not we'll be able to make rent next month.

It wasn't figuring out which bills are absolutely necessary to pay & which ones will get skipped.

No, it wasn't any of those things that seem like they'd be hard.

It was having to tell my daughter that "No, we couldn't get an ice cream cone from the ice cream truck this time." And when she asked "Why?" Telling her "Because we don't have the money to buy that ice cream."

You see one of the joys of living in the city is that during the summer the ice cream truck comes. It's only come to our neighborhood 3 other times (that we know of) and I've always let M pick one of the $1 ice cream treats for a special treat. This time as the truck's music announced its arrival my heart dropped. I knew I would have to say no to most likely the last visit of the year.

The look of disappointment on her face broke my heart and brought me to tears. I think it would have been easier had she thrown a tantrum or made a big scene. I was actually expecting her to do that. However, she merely said "Okay," and then went off to play some more while the neighbor kids ate their ice creams. She acted quite "grown-up" and it kind of made me sad, yet very proud of my big little girl.

Edited to Add: BTW...I totally think that M not getting an ice cream is a good thing. There needs to be times when she doesn't get what she wants and I know that's good for her. It just isn't easy to see your kids disappointed no matter how good it is for them.

Homework: Dear Friend

My awesome friend Jessica turned me on to this wonderful lady & her blog. You can join TravelinOma for class too. It's free!! Anyway this is my first assignment of the many I hope to complete.

(BTW I'm not sure how to put & link pictures from another site yet so I just hyperlinked the words. Soon I will be able to do pics too. :D )

Dear Friend,

I know you are worried about your husband's recent layoff at work. Knowing you like I do, I'm sure you feel upset, stressed, confused, and scared, but I trust your instincts. You seem so resilient that I'm sure you can bounce back from this difficult time with more spring in your step than ever. You've never given up on anything yet so why start now? If you put your mind to it you can do anything, including this.

You are doing the right things in turning to the Lord for comfort and answers. Try to cut your husband a little slack while he sorts through his own feelings of frustration. As his wife it is not your job to fix it for him, but to stand by him through it all as he finds a way to get things done. You will both learn and grow much more if you trust in the Lord and let each other fulfill the roles you were meant for.

Remember the Lord loves you, as do your family and friends. This too shall pass.

Always,

Your Friend

Feeling Blessed

My house may not be very tidy or very big. There is always some chore that needs doing. A batch of laundry needing taken care of. A hurt feeling or owie needing attended to. A crying baby that wants fed/held/rocked to sleep. There's meals to be cooked. Shopping to do. Clothes to be mended. Feelings of inadequacy & imperfection often creep up about being a good mom, wife, friend, person. It's a scary time of our lives right now filled with worry & uncertainty. How do we know that we're doing what we're supposed to? How will we make it through?

I turned to prayer & the scriptures for comfort & answers. In doing so my faith has grown & I've been able to buoy up my husband & comfort him while he struggles with feelings of frustration at the situation that's been thrust upon us. I found I can be there to support & love him no.matter.what. And that that is all I need to do...what I'm supposed to be doing.

After a night of tossing & turning with worry & stress I woke up this morning & was enjoying the quiet this morning before my kids woke up. I found myself caught up in my thoughts. Next thing I know I'm tearing up. Not because I was sad, but because I was feeling so blessed. At a time of such uncertainty in our lives right now I was overwhelmed with the knowledge of how much the Savior loves me & my family.

We are buoyed up by friends, family, & members of the ward. I feel inspired by the many wonderful people I have association with. Whether they be from high school, college, or anytime after that I am grateful for them & their wise words & inspiring stories. I am grateful that they are willing to share with those around them. They have become my network of support even though they may not know it.

I have a wonderful little family that is sealed together for eternity. I am blessed with a loving hard working husband, who strives to live righteously & lead our family in good. Who provides as only a father can. Who wants me to stay home with the kids no matter how tight things are because he knows that's where I want to be & where the Lord wants me to be & will stick up for me & that decision when anyone criticizes it. Who loves me for me no matter what. Who doesn't mind if the house is a little messy. Who thinks I'm a great mom especially when I don't feel like it. Who understands I can't do it all. Who is my best friend in the world.

I have two great kids that may drive me batty at times, but I know they love me unconditionally even for my imperfections. Those precious moments we share when they cuddle up to me or when only "Mommy" can make it all better. When B looks at me with those big blue eyes that say it all..."Thanks for feeding me...Thanks for holding me...Thanks for being my mommy.....Thanks for loving me."

I truly am blessed with the things that matter.

Dontcha just wanna squeeze his little cheeks? I do and I do constantly do it. :) Poor kid. He's growing up too fast though.

And yes he does look EXACTLY like his dad. Crazy.

Love the hair too.

Just a Hi!

Just wanted to let ya'll know I'm still here. Still alive and kicking. I'm finally caught up on everything! YAY!! It's amazing how dirty your house can get when you're always going, going, going. But it's all done and Mom came and helped me organize. Thank you Mom!! Now that summer is winding down we'll be home a lot more and things won't get so bad again. :)

Picture to make you smile.

My Newly Organized Bedroom

Before: Yes, sadly, I really did let my room get this messy.

After: Lots better! I absolutely love it. And I love the dresser Erick made for me. All it needs is the drawers, but I can still use it until those are done.

Just Me and the Baby for a Couple Days

Erick's mom took Myelle to stay with her for the weekend before she starts back to school. I'm going to miss that little bundle of fun, but I'm super excited to clean (and I mean deep clean) my house and have no one but me to mess it up! I'm planning to rearrange both the kitchen and my bedroom and finally do a deep scrub of the bathroom ( I didn't know tubs could get so dirty so fast!).

Erick is leaving on Saturday after I get off work to go backpacking with my bros, Dad, Kee, and a couple other people I don't know who they are. Those of us staying home are gearing up for a Girl's Night Out on Saturday. I'm looking forward to that.

Before she left today Colleen (Erick's mom) took us out to lunch and to the store to buy my birthday present. She got me a double stroller so I can take both kids on walks with me, allowing me to get out of the house more easily while Erick's out of town. Or just during the day too instead of waiting until night time. Thank you Colleen!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE it!!